the intersection

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anak_jalanan_111

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those skinny children on the street
who ran and laughed at the crossroads
clapping their hands while singing
naïvely  begging for mercies

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O the children of the street
who seeing to the window car with hoping eyes
sleep on the mattresses asphalt roofed the sky
can not complain to the unjust life

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images

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O the poor children on the street
your dream hanging on the fancy cars
your future scattered, blown by the exhaust fumes
always happy in the heat of the sun nor rain 

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the light had changed green
and the deafening horns shocked me
which glued on the steering
thinking of my children…. how lucky they are

***

 mei –

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photos from google

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a mother’s love

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My mom only had one eye. I hated her… She was such an embarrassment.
She cooked for students and teachers to support the family.

There was this one day during elementary school where my mom came to say hello to me.
I was so embarrassed.

How could she do this to me? I ignored her, threw her a hateful look and ran out.
The next day at school one of my classmates said, ‘Eeeeee…, your mom only has one eye!’

I wanted to bury myself. I also wanted my mom to just disappear.
I confronted her that day and said,
‘ If you’re only gonna make me a laughing stock, why don’t you just die?’

My mom did not respond… I didn’t even stop to think for a second about what I had said,
because I was full of anger. I was oblivious to her feelings.

I wanted out of that house, and have nothing to do with her.
So I studied real hard, got a chance to go abroad to study.

Then, I got married. I bought a house of my own.
I had kids of my own. I was happy with my life, my kids and the comforts.
Then one day, my Mother came to visit me.
She hadn’t seen me in years and she didn’t even meet her grandchildren.

When she stood by the door, my children laughed at her,
and I yelled at her for coming over uninvited.
I screamed at her, ‘How dare you come to my house and scare my children!
“Get out of here! Now!!!”

And to this, my mother quietly answered, ‘Oh, I’m so sorry.
I may have gotten the wrong address,’ and she disappeared out of sight.

One day, a letter regarding a school reunion came to my house.
So I lied to my wife that I was going on a business trip.
After the reunion, I went to the old shack just out of curiosity.

My neighbors said that she died. I did not shed a single tear.
They handed me a letter that she had wanted me to have.

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‘My dearest son,

I think of you all the time. I’m sorry that I came to your house and scared your children.

I was so glad when I heard you were coming for the reunion.
But I may not be able to even get out of bed to see you.
I’m sorry that I was a constant embarrassment to you when you were growing up.

You see……..when you were very little, you got into an accident, and lost your eye.
As a mother, I couldn’t stand watching you having to grow up with one eye.
So I gave you mine.

I was so proud of my son who was seeing a whole new world for me, in my place,
with…. that eye.

With all my love to you,

Your mother.

*

shared from Moral Stories

***

– mei –

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the song of bamboo leaves

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I slowed my step

watching the lodge carefully

the bamboo leaves was increasingly shade and skewed

but the lodge was still the same

as the last time I came

nothing has changed

when I opened the door

as if I saw my grandmother

sitting in her rocking chair

staring out the window…. humming

then I see myself come, clinging and question her

you are humming grandmother,…. what song?

oo ….  just follow the song of bamboo leaves my dear

a dragonfly passed by in front of my face

disperse my musings

I enter the lodge and sit on grandma’s rocking chair

try to understand the thing that she did

in silence …. I began to hear

a lovely song

I let it flow within this soul

to blend with the memories of my childhood

the song of bamboo leaves

filled my longing of grandma’s warm hug

***

– mei –

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a dream under the heaps of waste

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have not had the time to bloom

Mom,
you had said I must be patient and courageous
so I want you also be patient and courageous to faced this

you said if I cry then I will look ugly
so I want you not to cry
then I will remember you as beauty as seen

you had taught me to sincerity give and be given
so I want you to sincerity release me


oh my mother

please do not cry
I am not going too far
just to be close to God
as you said that God loves his children
well I am one of them
and I think He misses me
therefore He asks me to come closer

Mom,
I know that you will miss me
as I will also miss you
I hope you could release the sense of longing
by seeing those flowers in our garden
cause I would be among them
as a flower bud that have not had the time to bloom
although not for quite long
I am grateful of being your daughter
I love you mother

the dream of children of war

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our obligation


the children
they are here…, because of us

what they say
is what they heard from us

what they do
because they see what we did
they are bound to emulate

if they are being good
because we asked them to be nice

if they are not good
because we don’t teach them correctly

we used to be …, they are now
their wills…, used to be our wills

as we ever want to be heard
they also want to be heard

they rely on us because they trust us

as we ever want attention
they needed more,  than us

its our obligation to give them the best
for their future will be better than us in every way

***

– mei –

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sincerity

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you suckle at my breasts

you fall asleep in my lap

you cry in my arms

you sick I awake

Your wish is my prayer

your trouble is in my mind

my face lines carved by your tears

my tears to pay your suffering

I hide my misery

but keeping you happy

I sacrifice my hopes

but lash your spirit

not a cent in return

just

love and respect

you are not aware yet

I believe you will…, one day

the time you became as me

the time you became a mother

at that time you will understand

the sincerity

of being a mother

 

 


 

Why must be her…?

at the time you came to me
seems something you wanna say
struggling to be expressed
but no words spoken

then you look around
don’t understand what is happening
and again…, try
still nothing appears
you crouched in despair
venting with eyes teary

when I look at your face,   then I see your eyes
I knew there was so much you want to say
but still can’t
heart feel like slicing
the world seems falling
too hurt to believe
my dear little angel
you’re too innocent to understand
your deaf is my pain
your mute is my wound
and your misery will always be mine too