mute committment

 

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that woman is ….

I sit still
listening to the language of the heart
as if living in a world that far out of reach
where the bitterness and anguish hiding
which ready to come while in lulled

I sit still
trying to understand the language of the soul
hear the silence whispered to this heart
about woman’s existence on the stage of life
about the role that she plays

I begin to ask
what role is given
the silence whispered to my soul
she will arouse a passionate
she arouses the curiosity
like a flower that blooms without the aid of the season
woman is a beauty that cannot be understood
such as the softly melodious music sang by wind
such as the dew sparkling on sunny morning
such as butterfly that flies on approaching
she will be adored at her youth
but then will be forgotten when she grizzled
a fat and weak body waiting at the kitchen’s corner
such as leaf which ready to fall when the snow coming
such a tree eaten by termites and ready to fall
disappointment for no respect carved
but no tears dripping

I was stunned
and my body vibrates
heart and my soul become hustle and bustle
since that woman is me
again the silence whispered to my soul
you are the mother of your kids
which one day became
man and woman

***

– mei –

*

last words.

I could only cry

feeling of useless was strugglingĀ  in my chest

couldn’t bear to see him wrestled with death

moaned and groaned resignedly

I could only wish

If God allow me to replace him

but the desire was stream away with tears

such as footprint erased by waves

I hugged him and whispered

“please stay with me”

he weakly open his palms

written there “I will always love you”

bitterness slicing inside my bones

half of my soul gone along with him

after he carved his last words in my life

then he sailed to the forest of immortal

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before the last departure

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and…..I


and…. I could do that too
as same as you did to me
perhaps we could have the same wound
but not the same suffering
perhaps we could miss each other
but not the same loss
I know you could forget me
but I couldn’t forget you
to you I’m just a history
but to me you will always be in my memory

 

***

– mei –



that’s it


it came from my heart

through my mind

like it or not

that is it


***
- mei -

too much to take

*

Its time to let you fly as bird
then no sad will caused me

It’s time to let you free as wind
then no more pain will caused me

I can see you when you are not shown
I can hear you when you are silence
You came through my breath
tore my heart into pieces
and left it in bleeding

It’s too much to take…..

please fly as bird
for no sad to be cause

pleaseĀ  be free as wind
for no more pain to be taken

***

– mei –